Into a bottomless abyss is where I fall,
I scrape my soul as I slowly crawl,
Out of the depth of this blackhole.
The shelf-life of my being was cut to half,
Into the bright light I did not walk,
The way I was living, I did not want,
The kind that was filled with thunderstorm,
Choked with emotions, I couldn't breathe,
Ran out of air, I couldn't speak,
Thumps of my heart were agonizing beats,
Nothingness was my safe retreat.
The only difference between living and dead,
Is I lost my body and nothing else,
Blind, I still see... dead and I still breathe,
Numb, I still feel... for me everything is still real,
When I cried, no one wiped away my invisible tears,
Though I tried, I couldn't fight away all of my fears,
I have been fighting with me all of these years,
Now the deafening silence of the stillness is all I hear.
I hurt so deep yet there is no pain,
I have been bleeding for so long from within,
The rip in my heart was like a phantom limb,
Shearing pain of a nonexistent being,
To fly free from this ache, from this life I had to run,
I trip, I stumble, into myself I drowned,
My escape from myself, from everything and everyone,
I didn't know what else to do, except for what I had done,
Like a fallen angel, my soul cursed with my sins,
I hope one day HE would take me with him,
From the grey clouds I rise to the darker skies above,
Now all I see is black, the kind of black no one deserves.
*Even though I walk through valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. Psalm 23:4
(credit goes to "slipperythoughts" for having written BLACK and for being my inspiration....)